Counselling: Child's Perspective
Updated: Dec 11, 2020
Our inner world dominates every experience we perceive. The deep colored brushstrokes of childhood sometimes take life long effort to be diluted. We try with hope as they fade with a new experience- new jobs, achievements, new love but can never be completely erased. The focus on 'inner child' in Psychotherapy recommends reparenting that inner child.
An 89-year-old Catherine (name changed for privacy) cannot forget how mum distracted her by showing her chooks and ran away, the abandonment followed her all her life- no matter what her achievements, it bled into every relationship- marriage, children, grandchildren, friends, care supporter. She lived through World War 2 and yet the most dominant story of her life is not of survival but preventing the slightest hint of upcoming abandonment.
So how do we dull these brush-strokes, we had no control over?
We create reasoning- A choice. We focus on who we are today. We find resources that deepen the present colour and we release that which we didn't control... time and time again. We reframe it- we stick to the reframe and we reclaim the self with the love. We learn to love ourselves- even as a routine. This is intrinsic work and it's as arduous, repetitive, and commitment needing as anything. The unloved persona tells a different story as soon as you turn away from commitment. It can be eased if one journey with an ally, keeps you on track, keep your self-love high on the priority list, and keeps you accountable. Client-centred therapy or person-centered therapy is based on meeting the client with attentivenessClient-centered, intuitive listening, empathy, and non-positive warmth so clients can mirror that for themselves- the image of an external source invested in their psychological nourishment.
It is better than any distraction- Netflix, food, shopping, holiday- quick fix distraction because you can't run away from yourself for too long. Therapy is designed by the wounded to heal themselves and the best answers come from those who sought it with a commitment to healing.